Let Go & Enjoy Love: Three Steps to Let Go of Anger & Resentment in Your Daily Life

It’s so common in our society to be boiling over with anger and resentment towards others (especially our loved ones) who’ve hurt or betrayed us in the past. It’s also common to be angry at situations and circumstances that we’re in, especially when we start losing sight of our ability to impact our own circumstances.

When other people just don’t “get” us, when they aren’t picking up the slack, or when they aren’t fitting our mold and meeting our needs, resentment builds up and clouds our whole world-view. When things aren’t going our way, and we can’t see our way out, we start to feel trapped and overwhelmed. Eventually, we boil so hotly that we can’t take it anymore, so we spill over. (It’s no wonder our relationships offer some of the most challenging aspects of life)!

When patterns of discomfort and disconnection from built up anger and resentment continue for a long time, they easily sabotage our mood and progress. Our creativity sinks and our energy suffers. We feel bored at best, depressed at worst, and we have to squint to see lights at the end of the tunnel. It becomes easy to turn to unhealthy means of coping by overeating, overworking, or overindulging in other ways.

Today I’d like to offer three steps to let go of old anger & resentment so you can enjoy your loved ones and your surroundings to the fullest. Maybe one of these shifts is just the thing you need to plug back in and love your life more fully.

  1. Take a close look at your thoughts and your interpretations. What judgments are you making about people? How are you explaining the actions of others? Realize that there’s always a million ways to interpret a situation, and the way we choose to explain things has much more to do with ourselves than anyone else. Choose your thoughts, and get curious about any negatively charged topics. Ask, why do these people and situations bring out such strong feelings for you? Why does THIS topic feel so personal? Getting familiar with yourself through introspection like this is a form of self-care, which will have amazing results in every area of your life.
  2. Let the anger and resentment move through your body. Very often, these old emotions store right around your heart, in the upper torso area of your body. Shimmy your shoulders, wave/flail your arms, dance around to an angry song to let it all out. Take a boxing class. Scream into a pillow. Take a walk. (The picture attached to this blog was actually taken during an angry “blow off some steam” type of walk of my own)! To enjoy your loved ones fully, you’ll need to feel comfortable in your skin – once all this anger moves out, you’ll feel much more at home.
  3. Manage your energy by choosing what to focus on. Chances are, if you’re focusing on what someone else is doing wrong, you’d be much better served by redirecting your energy towards self-love and pursuing your goals. Recognize that you are the only one with ultimate control and power over your life, and make good use of that fact. When you focus your attention on meeting your own needs and loving yourself, you’ll naturally see the good in other people, and everyone will feel a very positive difference. When you’re contributing what you can and creating your life as intentionally as possible, it’s much easier to let go of the things that really ARE out of your control.

As you take these three steps towards releasing anger and resentment, while maintaining a sincere intention to improve the lives of others through your own unique talents, you’ll be amazed by your results. I’m sure of it.

Relax and enjoy. Your heart, your loved ones, and your future self will thank you. IMG_20170114_171837.jpg

How to Control What You Can and Let the Rest Go

During these uncertain and challenging times, it can be frustrating when people tell us to just “let it go”.

Certainly, letting go is much easier said than done, but it IS possible.

Today’s video will give you what you need to control what you can, and let the rest go, so you can manage difficult times with grace, trust, and ease.

How to Save Yourself from Drowning in Sadness & Despair

Do you suffer from winter blues?
Have you been feeling a little off or irritable lately?
Are you dealing with a loss? Or grappling with uncertainty about what the future will bring?
Maybe you’re not moving forward as fast as you’d like… you feel like you’re stuck in mud, and you’re not quite sure what to do about it.
In our society, it’s the norm to turn our backs on ourselves during times like these…
We put our nose to the grindstone. We “man up” and deal with it. We act like nothing is wrong. We put a smile on our face, comply with the usual conversational niceties… we keep DOING everything we think we’re supposed to be doing, and wait (sometimes more patiently than others) for the storm to pass.
Unfortunately, taking this approach only drags our sadness and despair out even longer, and it magnifies the negative effects on our health and our relationships.
Watch today’s tip video below to hear about another option for moving through sadness and despair.
These suggestions might be challenging – but please give it a try and let me know how it goes. When applied correctly, preferably with SUPPORT in place, you’ll move through your challenging emotions in half the time (or less). You’ll actually increase your ability to feel positive emotions as well, and with practice you’ll learn how to move through your sadness like a total pro – un-shaken and on track to reach all the goals you’re working towards.
Leave a comment below, or email info@briannamcinerny.com! Would absolutely LOVE to hear from you.
Take care. ❤

When You Need to Move from Agitation & Discomfort to Love, Lightness, and Connection, Read This

This morning felt more challenging than most.
My self-esteem felt low from the moment I woke up. Happy, loving thoughts were much harder to find than usual.
I felt a little agitated. I felt a lot unwanted. I felt uncomfortable being seen, I felt desperate to be seen, I felt much less than my usual confident self-loving self.
I wanted to feel loved, and connected, and appreciated, and supported. I wanted to feel beautiful. I wanted to feel alive and in love with every minute.
So… I took my time getting ready. I curled my hair, did my make-up, wore clothes that made me feel comfortable and beautiful. I painted my nails, fingers and toes, for the first time in weeks.
I noticed my thoughts, I felt my emotions, and I kept squinting to see the light of what I’m working towards through the murkiness of my discomfort.
I changed my scenery, and set up shop in a nearby Starbucks.
And when I opened up my laptop to start working, I came across this:
Three steps to feel more connected in your daily life
1. Choose loving thoughts, especially about yourself. Fill yourself up with love first, before you hand the responsibility off to someone else. Remember… the amount of love we feel from others in any given moment is directly related to how much love we feel for ourselves. If you want to feel more love or connection from others, love yourself and connect with yourself first. Do what’s necessary to take really good care of yourself, and be unapologetic about it. Refuse to beat yourself up for prioritizing this way, and know that in the end it’ll have a positive impact on everyone around you.
2. Connect with your body. Be gentle using movements that work for you. Be mindful of the food you’re feeding yourself. Consider removing chemicals like coffee, sugar, or alcohol if you haven’t already, and notice how this creates so much more clarity and connection in your life when you let it.
3. Surrender to the flow of life. Surrender to the bigger picture, something that’s bigger than just you. Find your comfortable place in that bigger picture. Trust that you have everything you need inside of you already, and that you’ll always be taken care of. All of the answers, all of the guidance, and all of the love you need to survive and thrive are accessible inside of yourself. When you come from this place, the people you choose to integrate into your life will only take you higher.
And… I feel SO much better now.
From the bottom of my heart, I hope this can help you today too.
We’re beautiful, we’re loved, we’re wanted, we belong. For exactly who we are. Every unique quirk, every imperfection, every valuable strength we bring to the world.
In the moments we don’t remember this, let’s be here for each other.
I hope you know, when you need me, I’m here for you.
Enjoy the rest of your weekend, my loves, and take very good care of yourself. You deserve it.
We’ll talk again soon. ❤

Three Questions to FINALLY Shake Those Last Ten Pounds For Good

Although I can help with various challenges, so many people want to lose weight at this time of year. We’ve been so busy eating, drinking, and being merry, that when the clock strikes midnight on New Year’s Eve we’re ready for an honest effort at a healthier lifestyle.

If that sounds familiar – you’re in great company! There’s so much conflicting/extreme information about weight loss out there, it can be difficult to pinpoint methods that truly work in a consistent, lasting way. It’s understandable if you’ve had trouble getting the results you’re after.

Today I’m offering three questions to consider when you’re trying to lose bulge that won’t budge, despite all of your best efforts and doing all the “right” things. (If you’re a writer, grab a pen and paper)!

Here we go…

1. How’s your mental game when it comes to your body?

I’m not talking about your willpower here, but about the way you talk to yourself. What are your inner critics saying? Do you give yourself compliments in the mirror? Or do you feel like you don’t deserve compliments until you’ve reached your goals?

Here’s the truth… Fully loving and accepting yourself/your body will always come before the reward. Keep your thoughts beautiful (whatever that means for you), and be persevering to keep them that way. The results will follow naturally.

2. Are you stressing yourself out when it comes to your weight?

Do your workouts send your body into stress mode? Do you feel deprived of foods you love? Are you constantly worried about calories, that extra inch around your middle, wondering if you’ll ever actually get the body you want?

Extreme/chronic stress is harmful for our health. Period. It also keeps those extra 10 pounds around our midsection.

Instead of following the mainstream that often punishes and distrusts the body, find movements that your unique body craves. Eat foods that make you feel fantastic. Crowd out the bad by injecting good into your routine. Drinking more water is a great place to start.

3. Do you have a subconscious attachment to the weight?

You might think I’m crazy for asking, but hear me out. If we’re having trouble getting what we want, there’s usually a subconscious part of ourselves sabotaging our conscious efforts behind the scenes.

Is the extra weight helping you stay invisible on some level? Is it wrapping you up in a big comfortable hug? Does it protect you from danger or offenders? Does it feel freeing and enjoyable to eat whatever you want whenever you want it?

If you’ve been trying to lose this weight for awhile and it’s not going anywhere, it’s time to look at what benefits it might be giving you, even subconsciously. Once you’re aware of the benefits, it’s much easier to reap them in other ways, so you can feel fully ready on every level to shed those pounds.

At the end of the day, strengthening your sense of internal guidance and following that guidance with intention will always be your fastest path to lasting results. When you’re in the habit of listening to that part of yourself, you WILL feel a difference in your life – and you’ll shed those last ten pounds.

Or… you’ll forget all about them.